228 days to Antarctica..."Because We Can" - Bon Jovi

 

 

Approximately 6 minutes reading time

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new lands but in seeing with new eyes” Marcel Proust the French Novelists solidifies the perspective needed to solve any problem.

Hello, I hope you’ve had a good week. My week has turned out well, thankfully but it’s not been easy and there are so many issues to resolve and problems to solve. This dance continues, three steps forward 10 steps back. The music is fine but the dance has become tedious and tiresome. I want a new dance, something hot and fun and a little bit raunchy to keep things moving.

Highlights this week have been many and surprising.

My friend took me to see my house slab which is wonderfully exciting. We went for a walk and Schrodie was so happy and excited to be home and walk along our old and favoured haunts. He even went under the fence to get into the secured property. He now knows and understands that we will be returning home. I saw how deep the excavation for the slab was which had caused the fence to collapse and I was able to see it for myself. It’s not good. They excavated under the fence and it's uneven. I’m not happy that this has happened and want it fixed immediately. Alas, I realise that a retaining wall is required and I am unhappy that this is the case. I am sadly at the mercy of the builders. I need an acceptable quote for the retaining wall as a priority. If not, I will find my own contractor. I'm not agreeing to anything without a quote. It's very hard to see properly through the fence, especially from a distance of over fifty metres and when I am so weak and unwell.

We are all in lockdown once again as Covid rears its ugly head.

My adorable five year old niece was not well and exhausted with a chesty cough. It wasn’t Covid, they’re tests have been negative, thankfully. It’s most likely the Bronchitis her brother has had and from which he’s recovering after his hospital stay. My niece was overtired and looked it. We had been chatting on the phone and I was talking to her brother. My sister calls out to him that the baby had fallen down the stairs. She was crying and in terrible pain. My sister took her to hospital where it was confirmed that she was suffering from a broken collarbone. I can only imagine how painful that must be, luckily pain killers were administered to help her relax and fall asleep. A sling was needed and will be until she heals over the next few weeks. It’s unbelievable and she is so brave, taking it in her stride and still playing and having fun. I have told her that she is indeed a Warrior Princess and an inspiration. When I asked her how it happened, she said that she had tripped and tumbled down the stairs. How fickle life can be.

Covid-19 resurgence in New South Wales has meant that we were able to play trivia on one night with masks as lockdown was increased into rural areas. Trivia was fun and we won. We played and wore masks as per the government health directives and requirements. It was cancelled at the other venue, which was disappointing. The Pub was still pretty full. Let’s see what happens next week as Covid-19 restrictions tighten further.

Meditation was also missed because of lockdown. Although I lost track of the days as well.

Saturday late morning, I received an angry, aggressive, threatening letter from my neighbour about the damaged fence. She threatened to complain to Council. There is nothing more that I can do. I have done everything in my power and am waiting on the builders. I cannot entertain or deal with hostility. I am doing everything I am able to solve the problem, as best and as quickly as possible, to her satisfaction. I can do no more. Immediately I reply to her telling her that this is the case and ask for her support. I forward everything to the builders, pushing them to move more quickly on this matter. I am sure it was her that complained to the Council about the long grass whilst I waited for the contractors who had been paid months earlier to clear my yard.

The other thing that I noticed was that the concrete bases for my $40,000 custom made water tanks seemed too large and too close to the house. I am concerned and unhappy. I question the builder and wait for his reply. I hope that my assessment of the situation is wrong.

My guitar playing is improving and I am happy with my progress. I have ramped up my other hand exercises. I am experiencing increased and worsened pain in my right shoulder and arm. There is increased discomfort and feelings of weakness in my hands. My strength is still fine, although there are moments of weakness. The discomfort in my feet has increased. Overall, I am not feeling great. I wonder sometimes if my fight is coming to and end. I wonder if my time is nearing.

Emotionally I am still haunted by the love that I have lost. I wonder if this is happening because he is thinking of me. I hope so. I hope that he misses me as I miss him. My soul suffers. I am grateful that I can pour my emotions into my writing and poetry. Herein lies my silver lining. My Trauma Psychologist thinks that this is fantastic.

Schrodie and I walk every day. We dance to three or four songs every day. He’s fine and doesn’t have any obstructions that caused him to stop eating or drinking. He had swallowed something hard on our walk the other day as my clumsy fingers could not extract it from his mouth or his throat, which leaves me feeling sad and inadequate, which I do not like at all. This behaviour is out of character for him and I believe that it is caused by stress that he picks up from me. I was hoping he would pass whatever he swallowed but I did not find it and watched him closely, as ever. When it seemed necessary, over a week later, I had hoped that an ultrasound would be possible to check for any obstructions but this was not the case. He needed x-rays. A barium meal was devoured and we would return the following day for a further x-ray to confirm that the barium had made its way through his digestive system, proving that there was no obstruction. I was not happy that this was necessary but he needs to be safe, so needs must. It looks like he is avoiding going outside early in the mornings because of the cold, even though he wears a jumper and jacket. His belly has been upset and probably caused him to stop eating and drinking. He had stopped playing. I was worried. He seemed better over the next couple of days. He lets me clean his teeth every evening, for which I am grateful. He lets me do this even though my hands are clumsy and he doesn’t like it. Schrodie loves the small treat he receives after his teeth are cleaned. It's a Greenie to further aid cleaning his teeth. He is such a good boy and amazing. I know that he doesn’t like being out in the cold or wet. Neither do I. Although dancing and playing outside in the warm summer rain is incredibly liberating for me and lots of fun. I won’t do this in the cold winter rain as this is a death wish. After the terrible, critical pneumonia that I faced and fought last year, I avoid going out at all in the rain. It has been freezing cold and wet lately. We enjoy our daily walk, even braving the cold. Most especially, we love being warm and toasty inside.

I have been flat out working on so many tasks that I need completed. I’m exhausted. Sleep does not come easily although my exhaustion keeps me resting after too much exhaustion, but not for long. I am still managing to have fun every day and talk to my friends and family for which I am grateful.

This has been a hard week but we are okay. I am incredibly grateful to have my wonderful companion Schrodie with his beautiful soul with me. I am cooking Spaghetti Bolognese and it smells ready and delicious. I am sprinkling it with feta cheese. I need comfort food in this cold weather, especially when the cold seeps into my body and my soul. A warm, hearty, tasty, meal that is easy to prepare, simple and cost effective.

Bye from me. Hope you have a good week.

I hope that this helps you in some small way. Please feel free to leave a comment about any specific questions you might have and share anything you think might help someone else.

Please read the poems, stories, information and biographies that I include in the hope that they inspire you as they have me. The song of the week serves the same purpose for me and I hope you enjoy them. This week’s “Because We Can” by Bon Jovi keeps me strong and inspired when I start to feel weak and falter. It also fills my heart with joy as it is wonderful music that both Schrodie and I love, as we do all Bon Jovi music. 

To all my American readers, Happy 4^th July – hope your having fun on American Independence Day!

Stay happy and well.

Until next week...

Watch this space.